Inflation

After all the dash of creativity (self assumed) at harakiri, and holding my appraisal letter in hands there is only thought which comes to my mind picked up from my friend’s tag line - The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to inflation and hence budgetary cuts.

Job? Anyone?

HaraKiri

Tired of all that bullshit I wrote till last year on my performance appraisals... I wrote this...

---starts---

I have become an octopus with eight hands for my clients. Also handling clients like A (can't give their names, they will kill me kill bill style), I have developed immense sense of nirvana as that’s the only way to go without going mad. You learn to handle high volume of work, unrealistic expectation, doing work of three people single handedly (now I know what Zen said about everything is possible, you just have to expand the capacity of your mind), engage clients when they have a pre conceived agenda of bashing you left right and centre (must have fought with their spouses early in the morning). With B(another one...) you learn to make plans on plans which are derived from another plan as for even talking to someone you need to plan the talking points, FAQs, brief history and geography as well. Your phone never stops ringing and you actually forget about your husband (I hope you don’t communicate that to him). Lastly, after doing all this, at the end of the day, you are still alive and have the capacity to take on a crisis that happens in a nincompoop place somewhere interior of UP and you handle it. Phew! For the sheer capability of it… I think I deserve a promotion and a raise.

P.S. I have logic for a promotion and a raise, after honing myself to such a position, it is impossible to return to normal life. Rather have more than less. I hope I also get some extra points for creativity.

--- ends---

I hope they too have my twisted sense of humour. Incase, not, does someone, anyone has an interesting job for me out there?

Wondering...

I woke up to rains. Rains always have extreme reaction on me. Either it completely peps me up or it throws me deep into an inky blob of blues. Latter happened today. It is my holiday but have to go to office, client work. It is like God has taken my request of obliterating Mr. X from my life too seriously. He is swamping me with work (upto my eyeballs I think).

All those who wondered (I suspect none though) where I was all these days… well I was doing what I usually do best – procrastinate, ruminate… one I know my brain will turn into a mushroom … rotting the way it does (eeeew… gross thought!). Anyways, giving myself a mental shake I pulled myself out of my bed and started getting ready for office. Work has come back with a vengeance. It is like Dilbert Principle… spot the sucker (me), encourage him/her with crap (me) and then download all the work to her (me), only consolation being my boss has left so I am alone in my pond… good way to show my ‘boss ka boss’ how much I work (doubtful).

Coming to X and Y… I was determined that I should now make up my mind and stick to one (Y ofcourse). Too much of see-sawing happening… but I guess my destiny has other ideas or rather my boredom… after a gap of 2 successful weeks of trying to avoid X like a plague, I gave in to the temptation of meeting him. I thought meeting him will be like you know “who cares?” Surprise, surprise I do… a little. Ok, more than a little… a little more. There are times when you want your man to tickle you physically, but there are times when you want more mental play than a physical one. Contrary to popular opinion, seeing two people at the same time is not always about lust. It is something else. I love talking to X and was symbolically patting my own back that here I am, sitting with him like a nice, good, platonic friend and not even …errr… digressing to other areas. Ofcourse, we both know what comes next but it is like we are gambling … pushing our luck and time till either one runs out.

Sometimes I envy Y. Does he ever go through this? Looking at him I doubt… I mean he is more of a ‘doer’ than a ‘thinker’. I can give my eye and tooth to take a sneak peak into his mind… does he ever drown in the spiral of thoughts the moment he sits idle? Sometimes, I wonder whether all of us live more in ‘ifs’ ‘buts’ and ‘maybe’. It reminds me of what Douglas Adams said in The Hitchhiker’s guide to the Galaxy’ – “He felt that his whole life was some kind of dream and he sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it”.

Yes, that’s exactly how I feel. I just hope if it is dream, I am playing the lead character ;).